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28 Beverly Hills Gothic
Above and below
My mother and me in photo booth snapshots, 1940s.
AN EMBARRASSING ENCOUNTER
My mother continued to say terrible things about my dad and Hallie, shouting, “It’s easy for them to tell you to be kind to me because they have each other, and I don’t have anyone! He’s a bastard, and she’s a whore, and you don’t have to tell me how nice they are! You love them, and you don’t love me! You only love them because they give you presents, and I don’t have any money, so why should
you care about me? You are selfish and self-centered!”
For as many years as they were alive, I listened to the same kind of words. I was constantly being pulled apart by the terrible situation, especially on holidays. When the daughter of Sonny’s brother Ed got married, my mother, father and Hallie were all invited to the wedding. When Sonny, Pepper, Michael, Laura, my mother and I walked into the wedding chapel late, everyone was seated, and soft music was playing. My mother suddenly shouted, “I see the whore is here, too!” It was a moment I will always remember with great embarrassment. Sonny often said, “I am the only man I know who has two mothers-in-law!”
MY MOTHER OR MY HUSBAND?
One night when my mom arrived home, a huge black man followed her and grabbed her purse, knocking her down on the landing. She was so frightened after the attack she wanted to move out of her apartment.
She stayed with Sonny and me for several weeks or maybe months. One day, Sonny said to me, “You have to make a choice: either your mother or me.” I chose Sonny. My mother became very depressed,
and it was another sad time.